A powerful, thought-provoking insight....

Give me a well-trained tongue that has been borne out of silent listening in the sanctuary of my heart.

~ sevensacredpauses by Macrina Wiederkehr

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Learning to Let Go

I wanted to share some of the thoughts I've had lately of lifting up my hands to God, clenched and full of stuff...doing, rarely being and having God gently open my fingers, teach me how to let go, and then, indeed, fill my hands with ways of being...not doing. Fill my hands with the strength, wisdom, and capacity to, in fact, do what God has constructed, instructed me to do. For what I have lifted up that is of my construct, not God's, is consumed in the Refiner's fire. What is left is of God, pure and alive. It is out of this Spirit of being that I can then do what God has sent me to do. I am called to pastorally care for people. I have been sensing for quite a while that there is more of me that God wants. I feel called to lead the caregiver spiritual support ministry we're developing in a pastoral fashion, allowing the Spirit to work through me to open others' eyes and ears to see and hear God in their lives. Admittedly, there are administrative, educational, and organizational aspects to the caregiver's ministry which I am quite qualified through education, life, and work experiences to do. Yet, excitingly, each conversation I am lead to have with folks further shape and define that ministry. It's beautiful. Why? Because it is of God. Recent conversations with folks are revealing the gifts others have for this same ministry, which is what I figured would happen. All of these conversations are building the Kingdom of God here in my faith community because they are conversations filled with love and light and Spirit. There will come a time, when all is said and "done" that I will most likely step away from this ministry and move into something else God has in store for me -- and only God knows what that is! I'm finding delight in that. I'm finding joy and delight in an intimate relationship with God. God is good. Can't say that enough!

I know that I don't get "things" right every time. Yet, I do know that I am doing what God has called me to do, in a way God has called me to be. This is what has made my spine strong, reconciliation possible, and new beginnings emerge. What finally occurred to me is why would I continue to deny it? Good stuff.

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